it's just words..

do you think about what you say?
I mean.. before you say it.

I went through a lot of years of my life saying exactly what I think without a thought of who cared.. it was my opinion, it was valid, and besides, I probably knew a little more about what I was talking about than the listener.

and then I met Scott.

this man doesn't say anything before he thinks about it.
and I mean anything.

I remember the first argument we ever had.  after it was over, he sat me down and had a little chat with me.  he didn't say a lot.  only that he believed when the Bible says  we will be held accountable for 'every careless word', It means it. (matthew 12:26 nasb)

as a side note, the niv says "every empty word"

so from that moment on, I have been more careful about my mouth. 
it may be hard for you to believe if you know me.  because I still have a strong opinion, and I often speak it.. but from that day to this, I have been very careful about spouting off.  and certainly careful about telling people off.  I just don't do it.  and if I ever do, the Holy Spirit sits on my shoulder reminding me about it until I go back and take care of it.

lucky for me, I married Scott and I have lived in a household without careless words.
ever.
and I mean ever.
in 17 years, not one time has he said anything derogatory to me, our children, or anyone else.  he always, always thinks before he talks.  he never speaks an 'empty' word.  even in anger.

what an example.

this last Sunday, our lesson was on words.
and this morning I've been re-reading some of the scripture.

proverbs 18:21
'The tongue can bring death or life; those who love to talk will reap the consequences." (tlb)

I'm re-committing my life today to words of praise.
I'm realizing that however high I want my relationships to go, my words have to go there first.  because words sow seeds. 
just like you can't plant a tomato and get a watermelon, you can't reap good relationships from bad words. 


come back to this scripture the next time you remember someone in your past-maybe from years ago-who said something to you that comes back to your mind. 
good or bad. 
be reminded that words don't evaporate.

incidentally, the next verse in proverbs says this, 'the man who finds a wife finds a treasure and he receives favor from the Lord."
if the mouth speaks out of the overflow of the heart, I want my words to be sweet.
I'm pretty sure I'm not a 'treasure' otherwise.