finding the good

So I'm not so great at blogging.
7 months?
Really?

I'll skip what I've been doing and get right to the point.
Thanksgiving just past and Christmas is in the air.. and I've been sick at home for a few days.  A recipe for too much thinking..

Rewind about 5 years ago to a very hurtful time in our family's life.. I won't bore you with the details - but just say it was a heartbreaking, frustrating time.  We left comfortable to go to unknown and new and in the end we were hurt and betrayed.  I really haven't held a grudge.. but it's a bitter memory.  I'm over it.. or at least I say I am.. until I have to somehow face it.

Something dawned on me last week.  As I was thinking of all the things I have to be thankful for, I began to think about my friends.  I have some good ones.  Dear ones.  As I listed the ones I spend the most time with, the ones I depend on, I realized many of those friendships were born in that place that ended so hurtful.  I think this is it for me.  No more wallowing in my frustration and hurt and regret from those years I've seen as lost.

A memory of time that has only given me hurt and aggravation when I think back will from now on give me a new resolve of thankfulness.

The truth is, I don't know what I'd do without these people in my life.  And without that time in our lives, we might not even know them.

So for me it was worth it.  I will remember the good.  I will think of the excitement of doing something new and I will forever believe it was right.  We walked where we were supposed to walk.  I will not regret.  I will not allow one more bitter thought to occupy my mind.

It's been 5 years and for the first time I have become thankful for that trial.  Finally.
Sometimes it takes me a while.